Sweets For My Sweet

Yipee! It’s gonna be a lovely and sweet day … (days …)

240909

240909 – 730 days  - 17520 hrs

Happy 2nd Anniversary Silly!

Choices

Every choice that you make determines your destiny. Sacrifices are inevitable but how much should one sacrifice? Every decision made contributes to your future therefore it is always important to consider carefully before making any decision. I  made  a decision to change the course of my life which may affect my destiny. I have to be prepared that things might not be what I want or hope for. What if a choice is made and the person that is out of the picture is me? You never know …

Time is something so precious that it should never be wasted but all of us have been wasting time in one way or another. Especially when you are young, time is “unlimited”. How about now? Time is passing by so quickly. Every chance and opportunity will just fly pass if you do not make full use of time. Especially for a girl, youth and time are crucial to us that is why we like to plan ahead of time. If anything goes wrong at the later part of a girl’s life … you can still pick yourself up and move on but you have to admit that certain ideal life you wanted will forever be lost …

There is something about me that I dislike alot…Over-thinking, analyzing and planning which cause stress, tension and frustration in me. I do have a couple of plans for my future though my future still look pretty dark and gloomy. There is a new plan in-store for me and this is gonna be a very tough ride but may open ways for me.

There are 3 plans that I have temporary discarded. There is no point planning these when you cannot even see the sparks that will light them up. 2 of my plans will be given a time frame. Once the they exceed the time frame, they will be permanently discarded because I will be too old for them. Ultimately,
it is my choice, whatever obstacles there may be, I am willing to overcome them even if the end result might not be what I wanted … I have no regrets …

Forbidden … Forsaken

FORBIDDEN … FORSAKEN

It is just a fine line between them …

Which would you choose?

Feminity

I never see myself as being feminine or anything even though I do have long hair. Sorry to disappoint…
I’m definately not those girls that are dressed to kill, in nice pretty dresses, sexy clothings and high heels.

I dress what I like to wear and they must look good on me too.
I don’t act like a sweet thing and act cute whatsoever.Do I like dressing up? Yes but appropriately. Right now … though I dress myself up to feel good but currently there’s no point … *Sigh … dislike getting unnecessary attention … people that you would like to get attention from ain’t here to see …

Heels? Yes I wear them but I prefer flats … Hahaha! There’s something about a pair of good, comfy and trendy heels that will make me fall in love with them but it’s not easy to find . They can be very expensive but it is good to invest on a pair of good heels that will bring you far.

Dresses are my latest craze. I love all kinds … though lately there’s one dress I would love to wear eventually … hahaha … *Daydreaming …

I’m just not girly, womanly, feminine or anything … I’m just ME …

命中註定我愛你

命中註定我愛你 。。。 你相信這句話嗎﹖

其實當你真正愛上一個人時﹐ 你會努力為他/她付出一切嗎﹖到底多少努力才是足夠的﹖

我已經遇到自己非常愛的人。可能大家會覺得我很傻吧﹐明明這過程非常辛苦但是我還一直堅持和相信著。對我而言﹐我對感情從來沒什麼感覺。沒想到我會遇到讓我臉紅心跳的一個非常特別的人。雖然有時會覺得一切忽冷忽熱 。。。我仍然相信﹐只要多了解﹐ 關懷﹐體貼﹐疼愛對方﹐一起努力追蹤同一個夢想。。。幸福就會很快來臨。

命中註定。。。 我愛你

Hot & Cold

HOT

Emotionally: Hot and Passionate … Of course I adore! Who doesn’t like being pampered and showered with love, concern and attention? But definately need to be from people you like.

Physically: I never like the hot weather but definately need it when I need to be outdoors or when I am wearing some nice heels hahaha. I just don’t like to perspire too much when I am not doing any sports … Just too bad … I am currently stuck in a forever summer country …

COLD

Emotionally: Though I can be pretty cold to people I dislike but I truly can’t take overly cold and silent attitudes. It just make one feel so insecure when you are constantly getting the cold feeling.

Physically: I can take cold because I love cold places with adequate clothing … Hahaha

So what if you are constantly subjected with extreme cold and hot attitudes … Suddenly Hot and Next is Cold … Is it better to learn to accept or find a solution to deal with it? What do you think?

A F R E S H

It’s time to start afresh. Nobody likes  a gloomy me. I dislike myself when I am all paranoid too. Looking back at my previous entries, I realize that I have been doubting myself and others which is wrong. It is still the beginning. If I constantly allow myself to indulge in pain, that will only make my life even darker. No more bringing myself down.

I am determind to bounce back right up! Believe me, give me time to prove myself. I do not want to waste my time and  my youth anymore. I trust, I love, I believe and I am holding on tighter to Faith. Not only talks, time to take actions. I am who I am and definately worth much more. Gotta move on positively and build a new life together.

Love you

Me

It’s me, myself and I who is making myself all miserable. No one else is to blame and they are not obliged to take care or even show concern . Why must I make my life so difficult because attitudes are always changing? Who has been playing with my mind? It’s me again. No matter how hard I try to work towards something, I fall back even harder.

What happened to the once confident girl who is so sure of herself, working real hard and looking forward to living life ?

Being alone is not an easy path, there are lots of obstacles as well. For all these years I have been suffering, I thought my life will gradually be better. I never wanted to perfect my life. I never asked for luxury, high salary, car or anything because to me, nothing is more blissful than having a simple and stable life with occassional treats and pampering. 

I made a change to my initial lone path, hoping the new path will give me more strength. I believe in something that I never believed in. Silly me, starting to think of a future and making sweet plans …  I thought finally Bliss gonna include me in the list. As I move forward, bliss seems further. Am I actually moving forward or being stagnant? Could everything be my own illusions? Thinking I was special enough to make changes, new plans, create new possibilities? Is it to early to judge? I choose to wait … Silly aite? but it means alot to me and I realise if I am forsaken in the end, I will never regret … even if it means that I have to wait till I bid goodbye to earth.

Maybe you may feel that I keep repeating myself? But it seems like a vicious cycle that keeps throwing negative vibes to me? I know I am not good enough or even suitable to be taken seriously by everyone. Thus, I strive to work harder but should I bother how people view me? You may find it weird that I do not mind sharing my thoughts openly here but I never like to lie nor even hide. There is nothing to hide.

Yes I am stronger than most but that means I do have a weaker part and I realise what it is now. I am a girl as well but probably a forsaken identity. Is it time to reduce my importance in people’s life? I think I am important but the fact is maybe they do not think so. This is why I keep saying that I have over-rated my status and importance therefore feeling upset when I get attitudes and actions that I have not expected.

That is why I place myself at the 3rd place, knowing very well that the 1st and 2nd are so far away … something I can never compare myself with. Infact, I do not have a status at all. Am I still at the 3rd place or am I falling off the chart?

Maybe it is time for a new perception and to understand that some people deserve bliss and care while other have to wait all their lives but will never get it. Thus, if I am entitled to it, I believe Bliss will come searching for me. I am here, always around when needed and I understand that when I am not, I am to move aside. If I can fully understand my role, I believe I will not feel so miserable anymore.

I always have love in me and I am willing to give …

獨角戲

夜深人靜 。。。 只能聽到哭泣 。。。

不管流了多少眼淚 。。。 不管再累 。。。

重複演著這場獨角戲 。。。